Thursday, December 9, 2010

Please write a handbook for the proper management of the Ashram

From Ashram Well-wisher to date 25 November 2010 23:51 subject Reply to Sri Sunil-ji for SEOF
Dear Tusar-ji, Please post this message for Sunil-ji on your SEOF website. Thank you very much. On behalf of Well-wishers of the Ashram.

Sri Sunil Guru-ji,
You have now convinced us and the whole world that the Sri Aurobindo Ashram is the worst place on earth and has the most despicable kind of people in it. Bravo and very good! Finally the darshan crowds will reduce as has been the case recently. But your mission is now only partly accomplished. 

Because as you are so enlightened, so pure, so perceptive and also so devoted, sincere and dedicated and as you know so much about the Ashram and how it should be managed, can we - the other helpless and less-enlightened well-wishers of the Ashram - please request you to guide the Ashram authorities and suggest to them how to solve all of the Ashram's problems? 

In this regard, could you now please write a handbook for the proper management of the Ashram? But as many of us can't contain our eagerness to read your handbook, some of us are trying to guess your first recommendations which we believe would be: 
Chapter 1. 
Reconstitute the Ashram administration and management and appoint Sraddhalu Ranade, Alok Pandey, R.Y. Deshpande,  Raman & Kittu Reddy as the new administrators of the Ashram.

1.a. Sraddhalu Ranade will be in charge of all commercial units with unrestricted powers for information management, broadcasting and propaganda, particularly through the use of new media such as TV. Moreover, he shall ensure that every member of the Ashram will be entitled to a free TV set as part of their "prosperity" so that they may view Agni TV's shows 24x7. Instead of struggling to use hypnosis or telepathy to influence and brainwash people, he will be able to use simpler means such as the TV. And finally Sraddhalu Ranade will be cleared of all charges of having vested interests behind his actions.

1.b. Dr. Alok Pandey will be in charge of all matters related to medicine with special powers to increase the number of psychi(atri)c cases. Dr. Alok Pandey's extensive experience with the psychic and the human soul (both subjectively and objectively) has led him to believe that the psychic is best experienced after some psychi(atri)c treatment. Moreover his experience has shown that the stronger the dosage used the better the results.

1.c. Raman Reddy will be in charge of the Archives. Under his leadership all archived material shall be... archived and frozen once and for all. "Archival research" shall be considered to be "Sacrilegious Tampering" and therefore henceforth banned.

1.d. R.Y. Deshpande will be in charge of the S.A.I.C.E. and will head the department of un-clear physics and give special courses on the theory of anti-(grey)matter with daily practicals on anti-logic. While Peter Heehs' books shall be banned from the S.A.I.C.E.'s curriculum, some of the excerpts from his books shall be allowed as reference material for the special courses on demonology the he shall jointly conduct with Dr. Alok Pandey.

1.e. Kittu Reddy will be in charge of the P.E.D. Finally!!! He shall dedicate special attention to forming his legion of Hero Warriors. Ananda Reddy's services will be hired every once in a while for providing inspirational speeches to the Hero Warriors. 

Chapter 2: Second Level Management.
The existing trustees will be appointed to do all the tedious and troublesome work of resolving disputes, running the farms and departments as they are already experienced in this kind of work. And if they fail, they shall be held accountable and they will be liable to be taken to court by Sraddhalu Ranade where their trust, faith, devotion and dedication shall be examined by the appointed judges.

Chapter 3: Sunil Rajpal's responsibilities.... 
Now that you have been given a head start Sunil, we let you finish the other chapters of your handbook.

But, it might not be inappropriate to mention that the direct beneficiary of such an arrangement is the Sri Aurobindo Society - to whom we understand you have an allegiance - who will finally have the privilege of having all 5 nominated Trustees on its list of speakers during all of its seminars and always at their beck and call. Moreover, in this day and age of outsourcing, the entire cumbersome work of peddling and marketing spirituality can be outsourced by the SAS to the 5 main trustees who have already established their credentials in this trade.

So as you see Sunil, you have a big responsibility and task on your hands. Instead of whiling away your time around the Ashram, please get to work and enlighten and lead us all. We anxiously look forward to your handbook and detailed recommendations. Well-wishers of the Ashram.

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